life really is full of ups and down. many weeks back was a period of boredness cos first BFF rarely see him also now that we posted to different schs..second BFF was out to china that time so coming back workplace was pretty sian and lonely for me. So manage to find some other people to lunch with me. Got closer to them for a wk or two until we recently moved to our new building..when sec bff came back tried talking to him but he seems very busy so oh well i didnt disturb and talk much to him until recently he chatted with me again..He say he is very busy even after he came back..well, i understand cos we have far different roles. In fact he is under management and i am just an educator..so defintely i am less busy though..when he talked to me, felt that things are less bored somehow cos after our move to an isolated building i felt pretty sad cos i feel isolated from the rest of the staff.totally duno whats going on and i feel so far from them..even wanna ask people for lunch also so hard now cos totally no chance to meet each other unless we text each other.. then fri was like a pre celebration for NDP..he is the organizer and jio some staff along for a lunch dim sum..somehow i felt the lunch was pretty good because at least i got to mingle around with other staff. But i do feel weird being the educator there cos honestly speaking not much educator would have a chance to these people..but well, becos of his rank the people he mingle around are them so i just join along lo..and to feel less weird i ask my colleague to join along too so i wont feel left out.i dun want people to have the idea that i am the special one who get invited..but he really dun dare about how people thinks but i care of how people thinks becos tt time already kana one time liao when the other colleague shocked when i am invited for the lunch..
Anw i going for an eye surgery operation soon in 2 weeks time..feel really scared though because i duno how will i look like after the op. The after effect will be having double eye lid so in fact it sounds like a plastic surgery for the eye, but yeah actually to be accurate its the folding of the eyelid upwards..actually dun really want to do this operation one but no choice ;( i dun like to do anything related to eye becos its so scary..i scared my vision will be gone after the ops which is unlikely though..but still imagine ur eyes will be under so many knives and injections how can i not feel scared :(
BTW i really hope he dun stir my heart again..whenever i stay away from him, he comes talking to me occasionally..and recently different guys just come talking to me..duno why always are the guys talking to me and not females ! But nevertheless i feel comfortable with the guys so i dun mind because talking to them makes me less bored. Life is so sian liao really need some entertainment man..
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