~my feelings was revived~

mon woke up kinda late then after which pei my dad to the hospital for his hua liao and to find out more abt his condition...so basically tat day practically i do most of the talking with the nurses and doctor cos my parents cant speak english so basically i have to speak to them on behalf..and now finally i know wat type of cancer he is suffering from le..its call bladder tumor which the doctor considered as rather mild cancer..and the causes of this cancer is largely due to long inhaletion of smoke from the surrounding or ppl around u...and the doctor deduced tat he kenna this tumor is largely becos of his working environment..hai~ so bo bian wat else can he do man..my dad already kana this kind of tumor le..initally i still thought was prostrate cancer so was super worried for him cos its kinda serious case man..and tat day i saw so many ah pei-s of my dad age going for urinary treatment then i know they sure kana tat illness liao just like my dad..then now every mon he gonna go NUH for his hua liao man..and tat day once he did the treatment his face turn very pale man but generally he still seems ok lei, not as weak as much ppl say..tat time when the doctor was explaining to me abt my dad condition i suddenly felt tat how gd is it if i were to have some biology background..at least i could understand wat he is talking abt..so i told him i reali couldnt understand a single thing depsite explaining to me for quite long..so eventually he drew a bladder pict for me..haha ! then i finally can understand..think i need visual aids to help me understand man..

then after which reach home le then rush to NTU to jog with xxx..i think i got abit "Dian dao" by his muscles yesterday cos its super big...then yesterday he was playing monkey bar and i was kinda memerized by guys who can do alot of pull up and monkey bar cos i myself cant do ma..so i envy ppl who can do pull up and monkey bar very well..but yesterday running around the whole NTU route is indeed super tiring man..but we stopped most of the time cos teng wee coudnt take it..but at least we did sweat so its not so bad then after tat went to the ah fang coffee shop to have some drink and chatted til like 1am before heading to the prime super market to buy some chocolates..then reach home abt 1.30am

then today morning i was still sleeping then received audris call cos she is helping me to find job too..so ended up cant went bac to sleep liao..but duno why today super alot of ppl call me lo when past few days practically no one or just one or two called me up for job..so past few days i was kinda demoralised when i send out so many resumes then none got bac to me,.but today i keep on receiving phone calls from morning til late evening man..duno why either..suddenly there are influx of jobs for me to do man..and surprising i got 4 agents to help me find job lo...and i feel reali apologetic and sorry to jason cos i promised him on the day when i pei my dad to see the doctor tat i will confirm wan the job...but how will i expect tat today i am offered with 2 jobs at the same time man..so i am kinda hard to make decision man..one is to choose to work with friend or to stick with my principles since i already promised him and moreover he is a reali nice agent whom i know him for 2 yrs plus liao..so abit pei seh to break promise cos in future i know i sure blacklisted by him liao and he wont trust me anymore since this time i can break my promise..so i told him i decided to give up tat job and he was reali angry with me..haiz...so i reali said sorry to him cos i feel very bad cos he has to clean up the mess tat i made..he got to account to the company (F & N)why i last min backup..i can onli say tat i am very very very sorry jason...ur job came too late..i think in future i cant kao him for jobs anymore since i have gave up the trust tat he has for me and he is reali the nicest agent among the agent i seen before..when i was speaking to him on the phone i felt reali guilty man..how how?haiz..wat's done cant be undone..so basically i have taken up the job at NUH le as some temperature screener job..duno wat the job scope is like either but heck la, as long as slack job can le..then some more got friends pei me work together i think my work life sure not bored liao.. ;) whee !

then today went to little india to pei the gers do threading..after which went off to tampines to shop, but bought nothing man..then when to the fox warehouse sale..but the clothes all quite cui so bought nothing home..in the next few days time i will start work liao..yipee ! finally got money liao and i can earn some money for my trip le !

~steamboat at yuki yaki~

yesterday we had our lunch at yuki yaki ..honestly speaking i dun think tat buffet taste gd man..in fact taste like normal buffet lo..the ice cream seems cool but after trying to wait for some time to "fry" the ice cream then can eat the ice cream seems abit sian liao..initally it started to be quite fun, but later get abit sian waiting so long..after which went off to bugis to pei the 2 girls to chapter two to cut their hair..then we tio a super shuai guy hairstylish..hehe, then the 3 of us kept on passing eye contact and exchaning smiles the moment he cut our hair..then after which went home to rest le..then yesterday stayed at home to rest and packed my table stuff and sch work..got too much things accumulating on my table desk liao..need to clear before my table get super messy..

few days bac my dad was still saying tat u know how did ur ah gong died? now then i know he died from lung cancer..haiz..my dad is another history of cancer patient..jialat he is going for hua liao tml (Mon)..hopefully he will be alrights cos they say do this thing very weak de.perhaps i will pei my dad to doctor tml then at nite go jogging with wei lian around NTU...and i am sorry to this person for jio-ing me to watch movie with tat free tickets..i think i know wat u thinking la...but i think chances is almost to zero % though wan to start from friends..abit hard la.... so i shall not waste ur precious time on me then..my ans shall be clear cut..but if its my eye candy who ask me for movie, then i would more likely more willing to go with him..but chances not high la tat he will ask me out ..and why are most of my friends keep asking me when am i going to find a bf ..aiya its kinda hard la..like no one likes me de lei..even those tat like me but then i dun like them even though their character very nice (somehow the feeling somehow is just very wrong..) cant reali explain where and what is lacking man..alright i am tired for now looking for jobs online..sian..hopefully i can get a job soon..

~the empty feeling after exams ~

yesterday after exam, i feel reali totally empty as in i duno wat am i doing to do next cos suddenly my life becomes so empty without studies..everything has changed from a hectic life to a slacking life..somehow just couldnt adapt to this current slacking life man cos all the time i am super held up with studies..now suddenly no studies to take up my life, indeed makes me feel kinda empty now..then now seeing my friends all attached feel kinda abit envy them cos now got so much time to pei someone they like..

then yesterday after sch stayed in library to wait for hm to finish her malay test,then after which we went to JP to eat our dinner then later went back to her hall to wait for him to drive us out for supper..we went to boonlay market to had our supper at 1am..then reached home at 2am..then today went to NTU for a morning jog with them..

and today my dad said something to me when my mum was not around..he told me actually his cancer is 3rd stage instead of first stage cos he lied to my mum cos he dun wan her to worry too much..so onli i know tat he is 3rd stage..he told me not to tell my mum nor my bro just in case they worry..haiz.i duno should i tell them or not since i know..my bro is overseas studying, i scared by telling him will indirectly affect him man..sigh..then when i heard tat i cried on the spot man, then he told me to take it easy cos he said tat life and death and part and parcel of life..haiz..how can i not sad seh..my dad can leave me anytime and then..i can never know how long will he live up to..and i find kinda kelian for my dad cos he showed no sytomps of cancer before tat until now..and next mon he has to undergo his treatment le..now everything need money ....and everything will incur lots of money..sigh i also duno now how man..for the time being i can work since i holiday, but after holiday how seh..and my dad will be very weak after the treatments, then how can he go work?? haiz..there are just so many many troubles and concerns for now tat i cant help out with my dad..i feel suddenly tat i am kinda suffocated with lots of troubles tat i couldnt solve and no one can help me this time cos its a terminal illness..

but yesterday i feel kinda better after ci hui's concerns..he said tat he will ask everyone to pray for my dad and hopefully i will pray for my dad too if i believe in jesus,,haiz..i duno la, all i feel now is i am damn lost and very heavily burdened with alot of stuff..for now i just wish tat there is someone to share my burden with me so tat perhaps i will feel happier in life..

yippee tml we are going to sing kbox le..long time never sing liao..perhaps tml i will feel happier with my group of friends around..and i wanna say thanks to jason too for remembering me and intro me job lobang once i email him cos its been 2 yrs since i look for him for job lobangs..anyway now i need to kao him find jobs for me liao cos i think now recession man..super hard to find job..and i need money now for my trips and perhaps need to support my family for the time being..

~i gonna be strong and hold on~

2 weeks of torturous period has passed and i am so glad tat i have managed to live and survive it through cos it was indeed not easy man cos i reali cut down on my sleeping hours alot cos i am rushing for time to study..but end up like also no use cos i always take my own time to study and nuah when til until the last min then i start to panic like mad..tat's just very me..but i feel reali regretted for my maths paper cos i never practised my past year paper at all so alot of qns duno how to do cos i tink majority of it came out from the past yr papers..haiz..then some more tat day was my bday then i super upset over the paper cos i cant do ! but reali thanks to those ppl who msg me the night before at 12am exactly and wished me happy bday ! cos tat time i just woke up from my nap and my hp keep on having continous inflow of messages..thanks ppl ! duno why somehow tat nite i felt slightly happier after seeing so many bday messages..haha ;) but on that tues which i came to sch for my math paper, i was totally damn sad after stepping out of the exam hall cos math is consider quite ok suject for this sem liao..if i dun do well for this subject then the rest of the subjects is even worst ! haiz..dun tell me for the next 3 yrs i got to spend my bday during exam..like tat seems kelian man..if lets say paper is easy then perhaps i will be happy, but if the paper is hard, then i sure sad liao man..haiz...so tat day after reached home, i was super determined to change my studying method liao cos i know tat with my studying speed i sure cant finish studying de and some more i feel tat its kinda pointless to read lecture notes alone without practising..(But seriously i duno how last sem i survive through without practising past yr papers, and yet results still not too bad) this sem i think cant work liao man..so tat night after my maths paper, i started to piah in the night and try my very best for my computing paper cos this particular paper is the paper tat i am the most CMI with..and turn out exam come out reali super difficult man..those memory parts tat require us to vomit out watever we has memorized (of cos i know) but then the logic part for programming, i seriously know nuts abt tat..in fact i finished the paper quite early cos i duno how to do alot of qns ! then came out of the exam quite sad too as usual (but not as sad as maths paper cos i already expected tat)...

then during the weekends, i was so stress studying le, then my student's mum called me..at first i was reali scared wat she was going to ask me cos i very scared to talk to parents abt their children progress cos to me i reali think tat her daughter didnt improve at all, but i try not to say until so direct..so actually her mum wans to ask me if i can teach her 3rd youngest daughter piano or not..so meaning now i got 2 students..actually when she said tat i dun reali feel like having another student cos i scared i cant scope with my studies man..and though the money seems very temping man..2 hrs can get $50 liao..super easy earn money man..so i kind of accepted the offer though tat time i was feeling undecided as to whether i should take up another student or not..seriously i dun understand why her mum wans to hire me lei..cos i dun think i am gd at teaching at all lei..perhaps i am more of leanient and dun scold ppl so maybe her daughter can learn better? aiya i just got alot of qns in mind why her mum wans to hire me instead of other better teachers out there..and i sometimes feel kinda bad earning their money cos i dun think i taught much to them, partly becos they cant be bothered to use in practise wat i told them and also i duno should i teach them classical music or just pop music, cos since young i was trained to learn classical music, so its kinda impossible for me to teach pop music when i never got taught by a pop music teacher before..and this sec student tat i will be taking now wans me to teach her something tat is quite broad based..so i reali duno how should i go abt and start teaching her from..haiz..seriously i abit stress teaching her compared to the older sister that i am teaching now cos her expectation abit high man..aiya duno la, since i got 3 months now no sch i shall do research for wat materials to teach her..sian lo...still thought can nuah..

but hor this exam duno why this particular person kept on appearing my mind when i was kinda bored with studying man..haiz..dun tell me...actually i also not sure either..mind very luan..maybe i just need something to distract me nia from stress,perhaps tat's not the real feeling of like..( i guess) so physics tat paper was kinda reali disastrous..but i think everyone also duno how to do lei..so means tat i am safe too..i think i will do better than for physics rather than computing man..and today my last paper is chem ! and i seriously dun think the paper was easy lei when most of my friends say are quite easy..jialat man..i hear liao also panic lo cos i alot duno how to do..haiz...but anyway everything also over liao lo..think so much over tat also no use cos my ans still cant change..

then yesterday before my chem paper i was freaking pissed off with my bloodly hell mum cos she knew tat i am having exam the next day still wan to find fault with me over unnessary issues..cos she bu shuang tat this june holiday i am going 2 places for holiday cos mon tues night i asked wp to help me book the air ticket to taiwan le..but before i book the air ticket i did ask for my dad permission if i can go or not, and he said yes so i went ahead with the booking without telling my mum abt it cos i know tat she surely wont let me go de cos she feels tat i should save up the money instead of using it to travel around..so i reali heck her and she was reali bu shuang with me..ok partly its my fault not telling her tat i am going to taiwan for holiday, but i feel tat even if i tell her she wont let me go either..so i must fast fast book the tickets liao then she cant do anything abt it..then yesterday she quarrelled with my dad over this issue cos she kept on scolding tat my dad is not setting a gd example by letting me go to taiwan..then my dad was very bu shuang with her too cos he finds her very unreasonable..yeah practically everyone in the house just cant tolerate her la..my dad said to my mum tat" why is it tat u always want to keep her at home when she wans to go out and look for survival herself.." when i heard tat i was happy cos tat's was wat i was thinking deep inside my heart and my dad knows wat i am thinking, but not my mum..so my purpose this time to go overseas without my parents is to train myself to be independent and earn money for myself then see how can i survive out there without the help of my parents..and wat reali pissed me off is tat i feel tat i am not wrong in any sense at all when my mum keep scolding me non stop and i got reali damn bloodly pissed off when i am already so stressed and she keep scolding non stop from afternoon til at nite..i dun think i am wrong in any sense cos i never ask a single cent from them for the trip...at least i bother to go out earn money myself and pay for both trips myself..and another thing tat pissed me off is i already treated her the air ticket to indo and she keeps complaining this and tat, that she will spend alot of money on relatives once she reach indo, so she rather not go..bloodly ass la..i hear liao also pissed man..if u dun wan go then FINE ! i shall ask my friend to go with me..

then yesterday my dad just gotton his test results for the cancer thingy..and its been finalised tat its a first stage cancer..haiz..when i heard tat i was kinda abit sad..cos i scared my dearest dad will leave me anytime..cos i respect my dad alot but not my mum..so naturally if he is gone, i wont listen to my mum de..haiz...anyway just hope tat everything will be ok and he live up to a long life ba.. ;( tat's all i can do for him now is to treat him better

~argh! i dun have much more time !~

ytd i was freaking tired the moment i reach home cos i stayed in sch the previous day to piah together with my friend, but ended up overnite didnt do alot cos i was too tired facing the comp for long hours, so end off to sleep awhile,..then yesterday continue viewing my online lect again and after tat decided to do JP a while to destress since its been a month tat i have stepped into JP man..yeah at least my mood was lighted up abit after shopping ;) after which intended to go home do some work de, but ended up cant tahan liao..so i slept at 8.15pm yesterday i woke up at 6am today..wah i reali slept like a pig yesterday..today i feel so refresh ! sigh..but hor i think i reali no time to study liao man..now super duper stress man..i got so many things still haven catch up and understand.and with my tortoise studying speed, its kinda impossible to finish watever i wan to study man..sigh..all i am do is to jiayou and give me more motivation..

~haiz..i am abit upset~

haiz..today i just got bac my effective comp projects and everything..was kinda abit sad when i see my speech grades cos reali super damn cui man..all thanks to my nervous tat time then get a C grade for speech..haiz..so overall this module grade is super cui liao..and i was abit demoralised too seeing such grades when everyone did so well for speech cos i expect alot for speech de..aiya nvm, everything is over le..no point thinking abt it..all i can do now is to do better for other subjects..

and yesterday i was kinda sad over this mo mo ren way of thinking cos i reali duno wat is he thinking right in his mind man.cos sometimes quite misleading but sometimes its not reali wat i feel at all...in fact i reali cant read his mind ! i am already trying hard to interpret things, but apparently i still cant reach his level of frequency..haiz..now i kinda feel abit tired le man for persisting my decision cos i told myself tat i must be firm whoever i like,cant be fickle minded like last time..wat to do seh...some more everything seems not clear, duno wat is it either..argh !

~i have been slacking too much man!~

fri i reached home kinda late man..11.30pm then reach home..and seriously i think tat day i wasted lots of time in sch doing bo liao stuff such as printing notes and surfing net..by the time i settled down, its already evening time when my lessons ends at 11.30am..wat the heck man, duno where i wasted all my time to! anyway every time is precious to me now cos i am working against time..i got super lots of stuff duno now and need alot of time to catch up with my studies..and i am seriously freaking sleepy and tired man...duno why...and tat fri night i slept at 4am cos the moment i reached home, i watched tv for 2 hrs, after which went online again to type out my project stuff and chop chop send to them and i woke up the next day at 12pm..wah felt so shiok getting so much sleep..but tat sat i reali never study anything except read one pg of phy lect notes cos i duno why my mind just couldnt focus man..it kept on drifting away from my studies thinking of other unimportant stuff..and the moment i start reading my notes the next thing is i will fall asleep liao..jia lat man..and so the entire sat is just gone le..so sun i started to panic le since i got 2 test on mon..initally i thought tat since its so little to study nia, so can take my own time to study, but later at night i realised tat i reali no time le..my elective got super lots of things to memorize but ended up i onli studied for it today afternoon nia for 2 hrs..wah but i think i am damn heng cos i copy the entire lecture notes for the elective test though i didnt study for it..i think the teacher did saw us copying cos he suddenly stand at the bac for very long, so i think he knew tat we copied, but heng at least he didnt exposed us..aiya but no point even doing well for the test cos i already intended to SU it le..first time i am so proud of my own copying speed man and it all thanks to the long term training since sec sch and JC..haha..physics test today i felt was not easy neither its tat hard..i think i just need more time to study then can liao..so far i abit rush for time so didnt reali understand the concept..

wah now all i can say is i am seriously damn stress liao man..haiz..i am seriously lost in computing now man..how sia..

~i am kinda demoralised le~

its been a week since i last update my blog le cos i was busy with tests the entire week..hai~all i can say is my test results so far is reali damn cui man..kinda demoralised liao cos i didnt study lots of them cos no time since i am the person who always last min study de..then yesterday computing test i reali duno how to even start writing the program at all cos i didnt even study at all though previously i studied tat super long time ago but all forgotton le! so bo bian, i copied my friends' program and modify abit..then the chem test also damn cui man..damn it..means final exam need to do super well in order to pull bac the marks..i am seriously bad in doing MCQs especially since sec sch le..so i can onli score in structured qns..so last weekend sat i was busy booking air tickets though i was supposedly to study for the tests which is this week..tat sat i was seriously pissed with my mum cos she kept obstructing me to travel overseas when my dad agrees me to travel overseas with my friends liao..initally i thought my dad dun allow de, but i was so happy tat he agreed to my request so easily..i guess maybe i quite old liao la, know how to take care of myself..he said tat since i am still young i should go out and travel more and see the world..but my mum's view is "Since i got the money to travel why dun wan to save the money and pay off my bank loan.." aiya i am someone tat like to travel and see the world..27th june i will be flying off to jarkarta le for 2 weeks..and first time i am using my money to pay everything..and i even paid for my mum's air tickets too though she keep claiming tat she is not going with me since my dad's health is still not very gd and his test results is not out yet so she is kinda worried, but i think by the time she will sure go with me de la..if she dun wan go then i will just ask my friend to go with me..she is scolding me for booking the air tickets the entire day til i super pissed and fann man cos i see no wrong in myself lo..come on la, i even paid for ur air tickets lei..at least i use my own money to buy the air tickets and not their money..and before tat i told them i wan to find a job for tat 1.5 months so tat i can earn money to use it for my travelling period..i even planned everything nicely liao lo..she even called my grandmother to tell them not to take care of me and not to let me stay in their house..my reaction was " wat the hell man..fine ! dun wan then dun wan la..i dun believe i cant find my own way there to find a shelther for myself..even my dad supports me lo..he say tat if my grandmother dun allow me to stay at their house then at most i will go to those tour agency and sign up for their travelling package..aiya watever it is, once i have made up my mind, i wont change my decision de..if i say i wan to go overseas i will reali mean it de..cos i think my mum thought tat i am just making some causual remark nia..cos i feel tat once its time to grow up u should learn to grow up and be more independent..dun allows hide in tat overprotected "house" of ur parents cos in future when u come out to society u sure suffer like hell man if u are too over protected..i am glad tat at least i have grown up liao..i dun like to stay in tat childish period cos i need to wake up my idea liao man cos i not young anymore.

then sun was preparing for my maths test and speech..and tat damn bloodly speech took up so much of my time man and end up i cock up for tat speech cos i forgotton everyline of my speech the moment i stood in front of the class cos i am too panic liao..and i am kinda staged fright having so many eyes on me..so i heck liao and read directly from my script..tat time my mind was totally blank man and i was telling my mind tat this is damn bloody shit ! haiz..at home i reali practised very gd liao, but practise in front of everyone i am so scared man..but my pronouncation was perfectly fine cos i am not scared of pronouncing words, just tat i couldnt recall my speech..in fact i am quite confident for my spoken english cos i think its not as cui as my spoken chinese cos many times i can reali speak gd chinese..all i can say tat time of the day is i am totally screwed up! so my day was kinda sad tat day cos i spent alot on time on this, but end up screwed up totally..damn it !

then wed i was spending my entire day to study chem and i totally neglected my computing cos i know tat even i spend lots of time studying tat subject i surely cant perform de cos i am not those comp person..cos i dun like study comp stuff..so i got my lesson man so now i very stressed up liao man cos i feel tat i have lots of things duno..haiz..and final exam is ard one week time..its kinda not easy to perform a miracle, but i must still try no matter wat..then yesterday i had dinner at my student's house..initally i reali dun wan eat at their house de cos i feel tat its reali not nice to eat at ppl's house..but yesterday the food was reali nice and i reali enjoy eating dinner at an outer space especially the ambience cos i feel like having some candle light dinner outside..and we are having dinner at a wooden hut with a fish pond beside us..everything just seems so cool !but yesterday i feel kinda pei seh eating with their family members cos i am afterall considered an outsider..but yesterday her mum did ask abt my student's progress and i was like oh shit !, how should i go abt telling her man..so i thought through abit in my brain and decided to tell her the truth tat her daughter is not improving much..but her mum wasnt surprised when i told her cos she knew tat her daughter cant focus..she did chatted with her alot and i reali find her much better to talk to as compared to my mum..she says tat sometimes if its within my means i can influence her postively and talk to her daughter wat's life abt and teaches her how to be a better person..cos she feels tat ppl like my age can communicate better as compared to her since our frequency are almost the same..sometimes i just dun understand why she hires me as her daughter piano teacher cos i feel tat with the money she has, she could have easily find a very gd teacher, but til now i am still puzzled..i guess maybe she wants me to teacher her daughter well..yup so my role is not just a piano teacher nia..but also to act like a counsellor and teach her daughter well..then she mentioned to me tat she is apologetic of paying my pay kinda late but i told her its ok cos afterall tat money isnt tat much either..and moreover i teaches piano not reali becos of money (and its from my bottom of my heart)..wat can tat $100 do much man..i guess sometimes i just wan to learn something in life and i told her tat many of times its not just earning money nia cos u have lots of things to pick up in life ! actually i will reali feel happy if i can reali educate and teach well for my student and i guess tat will be the best present i can get if she can play a very nice song for me cos her dad was saying to her tat "melody play some songs for me when i am having my birthday lei.." so i guess her dad mentality is also like mine..( Hopes to see something from her)..if she can manage to play a song for me, then i would be very happy liao cos at least i have made her learn something..though many times i got nag her cos sometimes she reali too lazy liao and take things for granted just becos she is freaking rich, so her mum tells me tat i should talk to her abt this taking things for granted mentality..perhaps she is still young, but i guess when she is older perhaps she will understand ba...her mum chatted kinda long with me over the table and she said tat i am quite a cheerful and nice person..she said tat if i continue to be like tat, i would surely be likeable by everyone..hehe..when i heard her comments, i was smiling away..but i think i am quite cheerful to certain extent but once i bad mood then my face would surely super black like anything man..haha...and yesterday i ate a peach dessert with wine tat they had it in shanghai cos they say this dessert cant be found in spore de..wah when i frst eat the dessert, i was like oh gosh, tat's reali super nice ! haha..

then yesterday after sch was with lab guy at library since he wans to surf net while i need to copy his notes and return him ..i think i have got to understand better of this mature guy whom i didnt realised previously and its onli after the long chat with him in library and our journey back in bus then i realised it..haha..but yesterday i explained to him tat wat they did in chem lesson was just joking nia and its all thanks to tat ah lim man ! but after tat i think i didnt feel pei seh anymore after explaining everything to him and continue our convo..but i seriously dun understand why my ger friends feel tat i am specially nice and concerned for him, but i dun feel tat at all..i think i treat any guys equally de..so they always like to gossip this and tat abt the guy i like..but watever it is, if i were to like the guy i wouldnt show any signs at all de cos i dun wan to be obvious,..and i am glad to say tat least they have finally change another target liao cos i am sian of hearing the same old person tat time when its not true..this lab guy also not true either but i think time will just tell everything la..maybe i will like him in future or maybe not, it will just depends on how well and suited for each other..all i can say is i dun feel much for him now or dun feel anything for him at all..just tat for now he is my eye candy nia..

haiz..next week still got another 2 tests then after tat major exams come liao..super stress man..;( i feel tat i dun have much time left though this sem i didnt get distracted much as compared to last sem and my studying speed this sem was much more faster le ..nevertheless i need to jiayou !