wat's the exact cause..

seriously duno why i hav been having headache veri oftenly..duno why but i read my brother manual bk and it saes tat actually one of the reason could be emotionally upset or stress..stress i dun think so but more of emotional upset..duno why lah..hai~then yesterday had a realiterrible dream..i dreamt tat i met a indian guy who was druken and i was kar jiao by him but later my brother came to my rescue..hai~so scary..when i woke up i was sweating like hell..later i went to sleep again then the same dream came bac..how??dun tell me it will reali happens one day..i am reali scared cos my dream always came true no matter wat..its onli how fast is it onli..

just tell her..

Message:Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?Boy: NoGirl: Do you like me?Boy: Not reallyGirl: Do you want me?Boy: NoGirl: Would you cry if I left?Boy: NoGirl: Would you live for me?Boy: NoGirl: Would you do anything for me?Boy: No wayGirl: What would you choose: your life..orme?Boy: My lifeThe girl runs away in shock and pain andthe boyruns after her and says...The reason you never cross my mind isbecauseyou're always on my mind. The reasonwhy I don'tlike you is because I love you. Thereason I don'twant you is because I need you. Thereason Iwouldn't cry if you left is because I woulddie ifyou left. The reason I wouldn't live foryou isbecause I would die for you. The reasonwhy I'mnot willing to do anything for you isbecause Iwould do everything for you. The reason Ichosemylife is because you ARE my life


a message tat made me laugh--> most attractive feature of a guy? -i used to think that eyes is the most attractive feature..but now i think that an attractive smile is much more impt..heehex..--> would you date anyone out of your race? if feelings comes, y not? race isn't much of an issue..communication is the key factor.. --> do u like older, younger or same age guys? older..the best is 2 to 3 yrs..(too bad, guys matured slower than gals =p)--> would u date a guy who smokes? i dun like anyone who smokes..so hell no~ my parents dun like it too.. --> does he have to be rich? nope.. it doesn't matter...--> do u prefer taller, shorter or same height guys? TALL!! definitely...hahaa..preferably 180cm n above..if the guy was the same height as me, i would be taller than him when i am wearing heels.. --> do u like guys with facial hair? ...nope! i prefer a clean look...love guys who look neat n presentable...--> name 4 impt things u look for in guys. 1 - sense of humor 2 - faithful 3 - honesty 4 - height(opps!) --> would you date a guy your friend likes/used to like? if any of my gd frens still like that guy, i WILL NOT consider dating him..but if they USED to like...it all depends if i am interested in him anot..haaha.. --> short or long hair? short...i hate guys in ponytails!--> honestly, when it comes to dating, do looks really matter? looks somehow matters, i wouldn't wan to see a person 24/7 with a face that i dun like..but of coz i agree most of the gd-looking guys have big ego~ lol..--> do u like built or skinny guys? i like guys with great abs..*droolz* but actually built doesn't matter bahz..as for skinny guys..as long as i dun look like a giant beside him can le... --> do u want a guy who would pay for everything? nopex..dutch is still the best! if the guy pays for everything..he might think twice of going out with me the next time..haha~! i wouldn't wan my boy to starve himself juz to save the cash for the next date so that he can pay for everything..--> do u like romantic or buddy-buddy type guys? a mixture of both..juz like HOWARD in eye for a guy2..someone who is romantic, noes how to impress a girl and can share almost everything under the sun~!...--> describe the guy you love? someone who LOVES ME whole-heartedly, full of surprises, great sense of humour, matured, sweet,drop dead gorgeous smile, a beautiful person inside out.. --> other things you look for in a guy? someone who noes more things that i do..not afraid of mistakes n failures..& most imptly, a gd fren of everyone.. most attractive feature of a guy? -i used to think that eyes is the most attractive feature..but now i think that an attractive smile is much more impt..heehex.. --> would you date anyone out of your race? if feelings comes, y not? race isn't much of an issue..communication is the key factor.. --> do u like older, younger or same age guys? older..the best is 2 to 3 yrs..(too bad, guys matured slower than gals =p) --> would u date a guy who smokes? i dun like anyone who smokes.. so hell no~ my parents dun like it too.. --> does he have to be rich? nope.. it doesn't matter... --> do u prefer taller, shorter or same height guys? TALL!! definitely...hahaa..preferably 180cm n above..if the guy was the same height as me, i would be taller than him when i am wearing heels.. --> do u like guys with facial hair? ...nope! i prefer a clean look...love guys who look neat n presentable... --> name 4 impt things u look for in guys. 1 - sense of humor 2 - faithful 3 - honesty 4 - height(opps!) --> would you date a guy your friend likes/used to like? if any of my gd frens still like that guy, i WILL NOT consider dating him..but if they USED to like...it all depends if i am interested in him anot..haaha.. --> short or long hair? short...i hate guys in ponytails! --> honestly, when it comes to dating, do looks really matter? looks somehow matters, i wouldn't wan to see a person 24/7 with a face that i dun like..but of coz i agree most of the gd-looking guys have big ego~ lol.. --> do u like built or skinny guys? i like guys with great abs..*droolz* but actually built doesn't matter bahz..as for skinny guys..as long as i dun look like a giant beside him can le... --> do u want a guy who would pay for everything? nopex..dutch is still the best! if the guy pays for everything..he might think twice of going out with me the next time..haha~! i wouldn't wan my boy to starve himself juz to save the cash for the next date so that he can pay for everything.. --> do u like romantic or buddy-buddy type guys? a mixture of both..juz like HOWARD in eye for a guy2..someone who is romantic, noes how to impress a girl and can share almost everything under the sun~!... --> describe the guy you love? someone who LOVES ME whole-heartedly, full of surprises, great sense of humour, matured, sweet,drop dead gorgeous smile, a beautiful person inside out.. --> other things you look for in a guy? someone who noes more things that i do..not afraid of mistakes n failures..& most imptly, a gd fren of everyone.. " name=replybody>

Yesterday was quite sick..gosh was coughing like hell, then some more no voice to talk at all..think todae will get worst cos I think I going to hav flu soon..hai~~hate flu..yesterday went to yi jie mum house, then she see me coughing like hell then she gav me a honey drink cos my voice sounds reali funny..later it did got better..at least my voice do sounds better now..
Yesterday when to cut hair..outcome still not bad..then surprising the hairdressing ger is onli 22 yrs old..then I chatted with her..she is onli 4 yrs older than me..she said she onli has N levels cert..and she was rebellious in the past..she didn’t want to study at all..she told me tat I must study hard cos its veri impt to hav a proper cert..she saes tat she has difficulty finding jobs cos of her N levels cert and she did mention something tat once u come out to work u will hav no life at all and u will find tat studying is better..seems like she do sound regretful for being rebellious in the past..anyway my mum saes tat she dun reali like her pattern, but I think I ok with her leh..we can talk to each other like friends like tat..aiya I think my mum got generation gap with her lah..actually can see from her pattern tat she those ah lian type cos from the way she talks..but she veri pretty sia..haha..
Kay yesterday I was reading a magazine, and I was reali those sad luv stories..eh think the storyline like mine like tat..except tat the characters must switch from a guy to ger..kay anyway everything is in the past liao..no point thinking and mentioning abt it..
Now nobody is at home..so shiok..can enjoy life sia..i will do wat I wan..later I going to dye hair secretly while they are not bac..then at nite must study for blog tests liao..hai~~so scared esp gp..how how how???my brain dun even hav anything on gp..all I think is tat the teacher talk cock one..hai~~

kay..

seriously i still cant figure out why i cant find tat bookshop even though i am in taka..maybe it just tells me tat everything is fated..maybe i am just not fated to meet tat shop..kay hav a terrible cough now..hate cough the most..it takes abt 1 month for me to recover..now dun hav any voice to take..my voice sounds veri nan ting..gosh..kay later going to cut hair liao..so scary...

~the trip to orchard~

i just went orchard just now,,went to boders there to eat bk..seriously i dun know got this place..think i reali like some frog in the well like tat..dun even know such places in orchard..haha..then then yh wanted to introduce one of her guy frien to me, call terence,..lohz she thinks this a match make lesson arh..dots dots..kay impression of him still ok lah..think he got ai mei one, like to dress up until veri nice b4 can go out..then he look veri mature even though he is same age as us..then he sae i look like china gers..wa lao insulting loh..kay never mind, he sae i look super cheena, and i dun listens to english songs one..and he is correct,,haha he went hmv and he bought a corrine may album..later he finished listenting then he will lend us listen..tat album sounds nice..first time i like eng songs sia..so qi ji lohz..
kay later i went to with yh until 4.30 until our legs so the painfull..anyway gers reali can shop until veri long sia..me and yh typical ger man..haha..then the 2 couples, yi guang and ester so the er xin loh..esp yi guang..yh and me was laughing at them for all their small actions like the way they hold hands and they were like so sweet..this is call romance..haha..kay now legs still veri suan, must rest liao...

~dun wish she will end up like me~

Bin was spotted with him thrice holding hands by her mum friends and they told her mum abt it..she was forced to break up with him but bin lied to her mum tat they hav broken up but actually she didn’t..hai~~think she going to hav a hard time..hopefully both of them could overcome the obstacles and stay happily together..i seriously dun with to see the ending to be like mine..
I wished tat in the past I could tell openly to my parents abt the relationship and not being so secretive in everything..i dun like being secretive neither everytime..but I hav no other choice..becos I know tat the consequences would be like Bin;s one..so I hav to be secretive all the time..but I do know tat everyone has their tolerance level, I wont blame him for his final decisions, in fact I respect his final decisions becos every problems started out becos of me..there is no point staying together when one finds tiring to stay with me..i dun wish to force ppl to stay with me..i wan ppl to stay happy with me..anyway I got used to this emptiness and loneliess life already..for my next relation, I will bring the guy bac, if he is willing to meet my parents since my mum did mentioned something abt future bf..at least they know who I am going out with and I dun need to play "hide and seek" anymore..plus I dun wan to make the same mistake again..hopefully god can find my sec bf and he will be my last bf liao..i dun wish to be heartbroken so many times..i dun hav a strong heart to take the blow..
From next term onwards, I will change everything I hav, just as to mark a new beginning and to start afresh..
Kay nite..sleeping veri soon after I finish my stuff..

~never felt so pathetic~

after sch went to S11 coffee shop to eat with they all..then we sat down there for almost 2h plus..just to chat and gossip..after which went to yh house since i dun wan to go home so early..then while walking, i suddenly feel like leg so the airy,then oh my god, i realised tat my shoe got such a big hole, then i show yh and we laughed together..then bo bian must borrow super glue from her house to revive tat pathetic shoe..cant believe i will do such a pei seh thing in my friend's house and i was laughing non stop like a siao ger like tat when i was pasting the shoe..gosh..then i went to her house to nuah and watch VCD and at the same time went there to do some maths..saw her 2 stepbrothers..they veri cute leh sep the little fat boy..hehe..
then cm saes tat she actually take money abt $1o00 plus from her ex when they were dating tat time..and she uses tat money to buy the things tat she likes..now she wans to find a rich bf then can spend his money..then i was thinking, she reali bad sia..take so much of ppl money and didnt returned..and worst still break up with ppl after using up his money..some more tat guy is poor, she saes..pity him, kana tortured so badly by her..hai~~~i just think tat even if i got a rich bf i wouldnt do such a thing loh..cos it is other's ppl money, also not my money.if i wan to buy anything i like, i will use my own money..somemore if bf rich also not my business..i just think tat between a couple, there should be luv loh instead of going steady with a guy just becos he is rich..but they dun agree with me, they still thinks tat money is impt..or maybe i just got used to the poor life for over 10 yrs..maybe i dun reali demand tat much in terms of money..
luv at dolphin bay has ended..so sad..there is no more sweet luv story to watch anymore..anyway bottle cap has finally found her dada..so sweet..=) if a guy would treat me like dada like tat, wa i will touched like anything..and my heart will melt on the spot like a chocolate..hehe..
then hor duno why nowadays i hope to hav an older brother..cos its like most ppl sae tat they usually care and dote alot for their mei mei ..then i like to dote by other ppl even though i quite old liao..haha..the feeling of being dote by ppl is nice loh..=) kay then my mum saes tat my future bf must be rich or must be a doctor or lawyer or he must be smart..then i can bring him home..she saes she dun like ah bengs..as if i liked like tat..i hate guys to smoke and drink and scolding vugarities word after word..if i see tat then straight away dun like liao even though how gd he is..anyway i think she is too money minded liao..is i choose which guy i like wat..as if she is the one marrying like tat..and i dun think i will like doctors or lawyers cos i dun think i am suitable for them..i too cheena liao..i rather choose a bf who is average in everything..but not too rich, cos too rich also not gd..they can find mistress behind gf's back..so conclusion is too rich is not gd..agree?
kay next 2 weeks must reali study hard liao..has slacked too much ober the last 2 weeks..time to get bac to serious work starting from sat..
i was reading frid frid blog..think he veri funny..i will laugh when i read his blog..think he veri funny when i type..haha..then i was looking at tat guy pict..my mind started to flash bac to the past..and i smiled..not sure why but tats my rxn..
kay i did a bad thing but i think tat person also did likewise..so we are equal now..neither both of us are willing to talk..so not my problem liao..anyway i got nothing to lose..cant be bothered..am i bad arh...i think i am abit bad but i reali dun wish to talk to tat person..hai~~~
yeh tml i going orchard with yh..cm not going cos she got some date..duno ch still wans to go or not since cm not going..maybe later ask him again..

~some stupid qn~

was reading frid frid blog..oh my god, he look like some monkey from the zoo after dyeing his hair..then the gers during the prom nite wear until so the sexy..i wouldnt wear until so the sexy..i will choose to dress up like a princess like tat, which will look like a xiao mei mei..sexy is not my type..abit too mature and lao for me..seriously i still prefer ppl to call me xiao mei even though i am 18 yrs old..xiao jie sounds so lao loh..ppl always call me xiao jie..eee..
then went home with matilda and anjana..then on the train saw this couple hugging and kissing..oh my god me and matilda was smiling at each other..she was too pei seh to look but i still continue to looking..but they reali not shy one seh..the guy looks like he just came out of the prison like tat, long time never do tat with his gf liao..then hor why nowadays i keep seeing this kind of things of train arh..aiyo..
key then matilda started asking me abt him and wat exactly happens btw us cos she didnt know abt the details..since she was so curious, then i just told her everything..she just told me tat everything is over, just dun think abt it..kay lah hopefully everything will be ok as time goes by..then at je, we went seperate ways..she went to meet her darling, then saw chun yew on the way,so i just went home with him..
going to cut my soon after this week..gd bye to my long hair..still thinking how short should i cut..hmm..
then mum finally see tat retaining isnt as bad as wat she thinks..she saes tat at least now she do see some quality results..even though i wasted one yr but it worth it..seems like many retainees are getting As and Bs for most subjets except gp..so after all studying so hard this yr isnt wasted..=)
then hor i was talking to my mum..then she asked me wat i know abt BGR..then i kept quiet and pretend i duno anything even i know those dirty things..wait later she starts imagining things..then she asked me wat will i do if a guy kiss u..then i told her wait til got then sae...but actually my heart saes tat if there is chemistry between both of us then can lah or if i like the guy then can lah, then if there is no chemisrt between us or i find tat the guy is disgusting and can puke then canot lah..hehe..she still thinks tat i am veri innocent, veri easy person for guys to cheat on..am i ??hmm..last time yes but now i know quite abit abt guys..so at least now not so bad liao..got improvement liao leh..
wondered went can i ever meet tat guy again..hmm....
then on my way to sch saw a yan dao..he was standing diagonally towards me..i saw looking at him while i was pretending to study my maths formulas..hehe..he damn cool man..eh i realised tat in yj there is this guy teacher who has veri nice build..wa..so cool also..but he not gd looking..still prefer mr smiliy..haha...

~the funny part~

todae woke up at 7 plus cos sch starts late..finally got chance to wake up late liao..then i take my time to eat and listen to 933 after which then i forceed to the sch..seriously todae's lesson abit waste time sia..onli come to come for 3 hrs..after which can go home liao..todae mr sim showed us our maths overall results..then shit loh i realised tat i forgot to hand up one of my tutorial when it is in my bag..shit lah then ended up the overall got pulled down by abit..but still those marks are still impt..hai~~~overall did quite ok..not to mentioned tat last week test i and cm topped the class..seriously surprising tat she will topped the class..thought her maths veri bad one..i also though tat topping the class should be yh instead of her..so never underestimate her man..then yi guang was so bu shung..haha..he kept saying why is tat her tat topped the class and not other ppl...then yh and ch also feels its is unbelievable..yi guang asked me did she copied mine cos tat day she was sitting beside me, but i told him tat i dun think so lah..acyually she also quite smart lah..anyway all of us were bu shuang tat she got better than them,except me cos i got the same mark as her, so no point having bu shuang with her..then yi guang suggested to ask ch to seduce her then she will do badly in her tests..wa he reali evil sia..then i told ch tat he canot make it lah,think ended up he will get seduce by her instead of he seducing her..then he not fu qi sae i can loh..haha i said tat wait til u can then sae, then i will sae tat u are pro man..aiya think he dun dare one lah..he sees her also avoid her liao after tat incidence..eh i think tat cm now likes ch leh, cos its like so obvious loh..keep messaging ch to ask him keep her test paper when actually she can ask we all to keep for her..anyway ch didnt keep it, he dumped her paper to let me keep, wa lao giv him the chance also dun wan..wasted..hai~~wondered wat is her next move..will she ask ch for tat again during the holidays..think ch will get a heart attack again if he sees tat again..ok i am waiting fot the interesting show to show up and i will laugh at him..
kay todae tat smiliy lecturing..eh he todae never smile initally, then i find it weird..later he started smiling..seriously i think he look veri sweet and cute when he smiled..hehe..then tian yu saes i always smile..reali..i didnt realised tat at all,.did ??haha smile more then gd mah, then wont old so fast..then i smile sweeter mah..haha kay no lah..at least i dun show tat bitter gourd face mah then wont be tat ugly..kay later going home to sleep if i hav the time..seriously i think i reali veri slack during this two weeks..did practically nothing..think maybe after this week must reali serious liao and must start studying cos promos onli 4months plus away..

~my day in christ church~

was watching the love at dophin bay once i reached home..which is quite late already..tian bian has finally became a famous singer and producer zhang was so happy for wat he did for her and having seen her with such a succeful career now, he started tearing in her concert and tian bian answered his qn in her concert saying tat she decided to walk the journey alone even though it might be veri lonely..then after tat producer zhang was heartbroken and tears was rolling down his cheeks..anyway the show was so sad, almost cried when i watch this show..i wanted the ending to be they together but the girl onli treats him as an idol when he told her tat he luv her..so sad..in the end, tian bian went bac to the guy tat she met at dolphin bay where they first met..
then yh told me tat sometimes i am to straightforward liao and ended up could hurt ppl at times when i talk..hmm..but my pattern always like tat one wat..i just dun like to beat around the bush just to say one thing..but i reali hurt ppl meh??how come i didnt realised it at all..
then yh also do know tat last wk she siad something veri insulting abt me..then yh asked her not to sae me until like tat..anyway i was quite angry tat time..wa lao i will always rmb wat she saes loh..sometimes i am just a bit slow, isit wrong tat i am slow??must she sae until i duno like wat..
sat went out abt 11 and reached home abt 9.30..duno time can pass so fast outside..then initally wanted to study on the train, then this particular couples standing in front of me so the er xin..the guy is so old, fat, tall, dates a girl who is a xiao mei mei, think abt sec1 and so short..guess wat they were touching here and there, feel veri distracting to read anything instead i was watching the show..realised tat the girl like to hus the guy but the most she can onli touched him til his armpits cos she too short.,.i feel like laughing out but i control myself..so in future must find bf of the same height or either taller by abit..if not we will end up like the couple tat i see..too difficult to do anythink they wan..
kay reach the control station only got 4 ppl turn up cos last min they got something on..anyway my trip wasnt wasted..victorina and sherman changed alot..she last time during pri sch used to be so big size, now she super slim and small size..for looks think she okok onli but christ said she veri chio..i think the chio one is wan qing..she is also cute , maybe becos of her hair ba..
then we went to acs barker there, near bukit timah area..oh my god tat doesnt look like a sch loh..more like a hostel to me..there also got a big big swimming pool..canteen look more like a cafe to me..no wonder ppl always sae tat ppl over there reali rich..now i noe..has 10 dish courses and i eat until so the full..not to mention tat the host veri yan dao!!!!this is more like a church gathering..there is also a table og hwa chong guys beside us..then got to know a rew friends from different age groups..then thye were telling me abt jesus..initally i listented to thier story but later i began switching off cos i started to find it boring..i just smiled and nod my head just to entertain them..kay i seems bad..seems like christian not as boring as wat i think..yes the bible is quite boring to a certain extent but some quite meaningful..then seems like in a church can reali make lots of friends..too sayang i wasnt a christian..then i told christ tat in future got any church events can ask me go if i am free..then i accidently made a veri sensitive remark til the host said something tat they are not trying to brainwash us but they are sharing things to us abt wat they believe..after tat i was thinking..opps..i said something wrongly but christ they all didnt sae anything..
then after tat i went to christ church cos she got the key and nobody is there..so i just stayed there..somemore must wait fot tat guy to come to her church to return the things bac..while waiting, i read the bible, played the piano since nobody there..then we also chat cos no long never chat with her liao..she is my pri best friend till now i still consider her as my gd frien but difference is tat she is in poly..her course comewhere near alpha centre, if got chance to ever go there again, maybe can go there find her again..then she asked me a veri gd qn..since u area a buddhist, then who is ur gd??ya hor i also never thought of tat..seems like i onli pray just for the sake to show my mum tat i got pray..everything seems like a myth to me..so dun reali believe everything my mum saes..kay then this guy came then i opened the gate for him..then he said"u were there for the west and east rite?" then i was shocked and i asked him how he knows..then he told me tat i am wearing tat "cooking shirt" wat and he said was veri unique..then i smiled..is tat a compliment of is tat a bad thing??christ told me tat i seems to be wearing for the star awards like tat..her discription abit too kua zhang liao lah,.,she said tat attracted alot of attention..oh my god then in future i dun wan to wear it anymore cos got too much comment..then tat guy asked me wats my name..then i just introduce myself too him..but he cant get my name correctly..is my name reali tat difficult to rmb meh??hmm..tok veri easy..ppl always like to call me "qing ming jie"..then he asked me how i find the programm and abt jesus,.,then i duno how to ans cos obviously i wasnt listening to ppl talking..so i just sae "eh...then i smiled bac.." think he should know wat i trying to sae ba..
after tat went to bugis there to shop and see clothes..didnt know tat there got so much nice clothes yet cheap..in future can go there buy..anyway my legs were hurting cos i wore high heels then got blisters..aiyo in future i dun wan to wear liao until necessary..i feels like she reali nice frien..i did told her abt wat happened this yr and last yr..she said tat having been through this, u will know tat who are actually ur true friends and who are not..she asked me to kan kai dian..but reali difficult wat..not i dun wan to try but reali canot..seriously i did thought of dumping away the things from ta, since they no longer mean anything to me now..there shouldnt exist any luv between us cos we also no longer together liao..hai~~but i still cant bear to throw away eben though i always sae i wan to throw away..maybe i just need a person to help me do the job then everything can then be settled..she told me tat i am not tat quiet anymore as compared to last time..pri sch tat time i seldom even talk at all..then most i talk is less than 30 sentences in sch..horrible rite??hehe..but now at least got improvement liao..so not too bad..wondered will the dream tat i dreamt of will it ever come true??does god reali exist??if there is can they tell me in my dreams again..i reali wish to know the ans..
todae lessons veri veri bored..mind not working nowadys..was reading tat alvin account..oh my god he didicate a love message for the ger..wa sweet..wondered who is the ger..tok he veri guai one..so he is deeply in luv..ohh i see..last yr see him in mm competition doesnt look tat he this kind of pattern..kat now i know..last yr maril told me tat he kept looking at her..hmm..cant be her rite??okay i am just onli guessing..anyway it was reali sweet i think in a ger opinion..wondered wat does the number represent??isit a luv code or wat>>hmm..

~the swear~

from todae onwards, i qm no longer consider BT as my frien unless tat person take the initiative to talk to me, then maybe i can reconsider my choice..finally i have seen tat person true colour liao..so i see..i am so stupid to believe everything tat BT saes..even if i need something, i die die also wont ask for tat person's help, i rather suffer in silence..and i dun wish to see tat person's face..even if i were to see tat person i will treat tat person as transparent and treat tat person as a stranger..
and tat suan kuay just broke up with his university gf few weeks ago.. and yet he now found a new gf in yj..hai~~~no wonder ppl always sae tat guys are heartless and they change heart veri fast, not like gers, they are usually ppl who has feelings for everything they use or hav..and one eg of those heartless guy is tat suan kuay and his kelvin, a pervert looking guy who always like to look at gers..wondered why they broke up sia..heard tat they hav been together for 4 yrs and now they broke up..and tat suan kuay still got the mood to find a new gf..wat the hell..i should sae he is lousy,,used to admire him alot now changed view liao..think tat ger must be veri veri sad now..somemore 4 yrs plus leh, how can not sad at all..i also feel sad for her man..,think she must be crying for days..saw her b4 in orchard with tat suan kuay, think she not bad leh, wondered wat actually happened..hmmm...
todae lessons so sian, had lessons continuously for 3hrs..i cant reali understand wat the lecturer was talking abt todae on chem bonding..i onli understand part by part but cant see the link at all..btw by must we study those ionic bond and covalent bond ah..as if when we come out to work then ur boss will test u on the knowledge on ionic and covalent bond meh..and studying all those subjects is like useless leh, think except for maths then maybe got some use, if they teach u how to caculate money and all those..
excited for tml..still duno wat should i wear..still thinking..eh i reali thinking i like going for fashion show sia.,.canot wear too ugly lah cos lots of them are poly students, then if wear abit ugly then feel veri extra leh..maybe i will wear platform shoes if i cant find any shoes in my house.this weekend got lots of hw to do but still i dun care liao lah, holidays wat anyway..

~waiting and waiting~

wondered who is tat idiot who call me..my hp still hanging!!!better not my brother..he is so sickening todae..never go sch todae then keep calling my hp when i was having lessons just to kar jiao me..i will get bac to him when i go home..ok i will wait for my hp to finished hanging til 5..after 5 then i will give up..kay the end..wont write anymore..

~just passing my time away while waiting for my hp to finish hanging~

kay i reali enough of my musem hp..always hanged..last few days i must wait for 1.5 b4 the hp finished hanging..must reali go home to ask my mum to take out the other hp..at least tat one wont hang..
then decided to read some bo liao things to pass time, hopfully it wont hang too long..kay was reali the 5 language of luv since tat time i didnt read it..kay now i was reading think tat some they sae veri funny leh..espically on the physical touch..wait ah i copy over..
How many times do we hear about people not feeling loved by their partner, much to the partner’s surprise and frustration? According to Gary Chapman, author of “the Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate” it is often the case that love is there and being expressed, but not in the “language” that the loved one understands. Each of us has a primary language of love…ways that we express love and things we see as expressions of love. If we can learn and use each other’s love language we can increase the quality in our relationships.
Gary identifies these five love languages as:
*Words of Affirmation. An unsolicited compliment, a kind word, and words of encouragement are very powerful. Mark Twain once said “I can live for two months on a good compliment.”
*Quality Time. This means togetherness and personal connection, not just being physically nearby. Learn to have a quality conversation, really listening to each other. Take time to have fun together. Do things you each enjoy; explore new activities together.
*Receiving Gifts. The message here is that the gift giver was thinking of you and wanted to let you know. Expense is not the main thing – it’s the meaning. A favorite treat picked up on the way home or a card for no reason sends a priceless message.
*Acts of Service. Cooking, washing the car, laundry can be acts of love. Challenge the stereotypes. Doing something that is helpful to your loved one will be noticed, if it is their language of love.
*Physical Touch. A hug, a kiss, holding hands, and sexual intercourse are all ways of communicating love. Research indicates that positive physical contact is important to emotional health; some say you need four hugs a day.
Do you know your partner’s primary love language? If you aren’t communicating your love in ways your partner understands, your relationship may suffer.
kay so the person is trying to sae tat if there is no hug then can die lah isit??
then hor todae i rmb we went to the popular to see magazines..then hor tat yh went to pick up the fhm magazine..gosh then we read together...wa lao i veri pei seh sia cos we wearing sch unifrom..then got ppl looking..then cm saw something..u know wat there is this competition which u can sent to the magazine then can win some prize..then cm said she wanted to sent her half topless pict without of her face..oh my gosh her tat one reali tat big meh..then also she better dun show her face lah if not ppl will puke out if they see is her..eh tanu u agree with me rite??guys are puke..even my class guys giv tat puking face when we mentioned abt her..

~just feel upset abt her comment~

yesterday during gp, we were talking abt the outing to orchard next fri..ch initally wanted to go with us but later he changed his mind cos she is going..aiya so sayang, if got guy go then will be more fun..then during maths, mr sim asked her why she didnt came for the test, then she told him tat her grandpa died..why actually her grandpa died long ago..she looks serious when she is lying..me and yh was going to laugh out but we hav to hold our breathe cos later he sees through the lie then she will die..and now i learn a new style of lying to bluff teacher if i were to pon sch for someting else..
then she said something during break time which is reali guo fen..i was quite angry with her by the comment she made on me but i decided to keep quiet and let the matter rest..i didnt wan to sae her bac cos dun wan to end up quarreling with ppl..am i reali such a nice person to bully meh??i dun sae bac ppl and kept quiet doesnt mean i nice to bully..am i reali so nice tat ppl always wan to step on my head..maybe i am just not fierce enough..i dun understand, sec sch also like tat, now also like tat, why cant i hav a nice frien who appreciate for who i am..sometimes i just feel veri sad when i think of this..they just haven seen the other side of me..i can be angry if i wan to and can use tat bu shuang tone to talk to them also can..hai~~~i still miss my ex classmates, at least i do feel some warmed last yr, but this yr my class is veri complicated..many things arent simple as wat we see..wondered wat will i do once they leave the college..hai~~i think i will be veri lonely to travel to sch alone..cant depend on tat bessie even though she lives opposite my house, cos she always late..also no friends to talk to when i need them..
then maths test easy like anything, think tat score close to 90% i think..first time do such easy paper cos is not set by tat mr sim..then i realised tat the some of the previous class test, i couldnt do tat well cos i panicked too much and got stressed up until i couldnt think properly..but gd to sae tat my confidence is bac for maths..horray..i just treat it as a normal paper and indeed i did well..then i also came to know yesterday tat she actually is 1 yr older than us cos she kanna kicked out by cresent due to poor conduct..plus she did smoke b4..gosh no wonder the sch kicked her out..think she bad ger lah..luckily i am still not influenced by her..if not i wil be letting myself and my friends down..
then todae came early for the chem tutorial..todae mind was working..didnt reali catch wat he was teaching..my mind is half asleep at lala land..then tanu told me tat she dreamt of me marrying a guy..hmm..wondered who is tat guy..asked her who but she sae she cant see..aiya so sayang..then hor mr chung neck got two to three red spots..then i was thinking is it a mosquito bite or is it a luv bite arh..then i was wondering the whole lesson cos reali distracting leh..i sit in front of him then i keep seeing his neck..then conclusion is tat is a luv bite i think cos cant be mosquito bite cos i observed veri long liao..but hor cant believe tat a teacher can do tat..tok teacher all veri guai one..they also know such kind of things meh??i wondered the ppl in the class got see or not ah..hmm..so todae i wasnt reali concentration cos i was thinking wat was it plus mind was partly sleeping..
then next was maths lect..the teacher canot teach lah..duno wat she trying to sae..her public speaking abit bad..need some improvement..i realised tat this yr all maths teacher quite lousy leh except for one tat is gd..sian man duno how can i survive like tat..then later we went out to eat then on the way saw aik bin with her bf..the guy veri pei seh when we see them together..he was like hiding his face from us..anyway the guy look veri boy boy type and honest looking..aik bin reali pro sia..went out with bf and never came bac sch for lessons..wonder now she going to catch up man cos todae reali thought alot to cover..
me now holiday mood..dun feel like doing anything..duno feel like zho boing..

hard pain~~

my heart just feels pain...haiz~~~~~~
i thought for a nite..still considering should i or should i not???hai~~why does did situation always happen..cant my heart just tell me a stand then i can make my decision quick and fast...