jiayou qm, i must tell myself tat i can do it de cos i am slowly getting out of his shadow le..give me another few more months i am sure i can do it ! certain time of these past few days when i was in the bus doing nothing, then i started asking myself if i do reali like him or not..i guess perhaps not cos he is not the one tat i am reali looking for..all along its the unknown attraction tat makes me eye candy him which can fade away easily ( i guess) if he were to step out slowly of my life..maybe wat my friend is right, i should heed his advice and forget him cos there wont be a ending de cos things are just kinda impossible between us..ya la all along i already knew tat liao, just tat i kept on deceiving myself nia hoping for miracle to happen only just like waiting for mr xxx. sometimes living in the world of lies just seems so shuang, at times just hope to stay there forever dun wan to wake up from those beautiful lies..gd bye eye candy..i am determine this time liao..so pls dun make me change my mind by entering into my life once again. gd luck to me kay..and i wont hope for miracles in er zuo ju ze wen le cos its kinda impossible..if u got see tat taiwan drama u will know wat i mean..but from my view i do saulte tat xiang qin for her determination to pursue something she wans.i dun have tat determination as comparaed to her..so now i wanna give up liao..and its time to wake up my idea too liao cos reali very tired le..
thur i finished work at 1.30pm then roam around waiting for 6.30pm to come so tat i can go my student house liao cos i dun like going there too late since its super ulu there cos its all ah nei and guys in tat industrial district..so sometimes i am abit scared to walk alone there..but heck la, i think they dare not do anything to me either..at most i will just scream if they dare to do anything to me.haha.but i believe tat there are lots of prostitution cases going on cos i always see lots of gers standing on the road jio-ing business..then i see liao half sian lo..i just scared tat those ah nei think tat i am one of those kind then approach me then i sure whack them lo...then my student's mum called me to tell me tat thur tat i come at 8.30pm instead..i was like "ok..though heart was feeling kinda unwilling cos kinda late lei.." and i need to wait so long..wa lao so i went to ntu to eat the zhu char then fall asleep on the table while waiting for time to past..her mum was telling me tat if possible try to be more sensitive towards their daughter as in try not to compare them..cos she say teenagers at age 14 or 15 can be quite sensitive..yeah i wont compare them de la..cos i know the feeling just like how my mum compares me with my brother..but somehow my heart will indirectly compare them though i say i wont comapre, but i wont say out de cos i know its kinda hurting to the older sis if i were to say tat the younger sis is much more better than her..so now i try to encourage her cos i been through wat she been through la..she always think she cant do it so i must phsycho her tat she can do it de..so its the lack of confidence tat she is lacking.tat day she suddenly wrap her arms around me saying tat " u are such a nice person..i have never tell all these to anyone.." wah when i heard tat my heart was feeling kinda touched..hehe cos i feel tat sense of satisfaction tat i can change her slowly day by day..maybe i just need more time to teach her well..so i told her in return tat " no lah, maybe u treat me as a friend..tat's why..." she says tat she dun even tell her older sis such things..i guess i got the lovable chacracter ba, tat's why everyone trust me so much and let me be their listening ear..;) whee..or maybe i just got tat curing effect when someone is down..cos i feel tat this student of mine can change for the better de, just tat need to spend more effort on her can liao..i wont give up on hopeless student de like other teachers do cos i understand the feeling of being give up by ppl..its feels kinda reali not shuang..so my mission now is to teach her well..i can treat her as my younger sister also can..haiz..but now i need to go their house twice a week liao instead of once cos her mum wants to split..sian man cos waste more time cos recently no time for myself le ever since i started to do shift work..i have no time to go shopping and go out with friends..and i think i am gonna out of job soon too la..swine flu is going to end liao..and tat ace is kinda pei seh cos he say we always quite active got help him work, but recently no slot..aiya i dun blame him..can understand he quite stress with the planning of the roster so cant accomodate everyone..at most reali canot earn much then i go find other job..i still think my invitrogen job is the best liao..pay super high yet welfare still so well..and i got to pick up my slang from there too after so much interactions with many ang mo everyday..tat's why some ppl cant believe tat i am from yj cos one of the ger tat i am currently working with thought i am from ACJC cos she overheard my convo with ace tat day thinking why am i talking in such a slang tone (still thought i am giving a lecture)
yesterday was not supposed to work de but ended up early in the morning tat ace call me when i was sleeping asking me if i come for replacement or not..i say ok lo since i at home also zhuo bo so go out earn some money ba..so started work from 2pm to 9pm..wah tat job is freaking sian man but i abit bu se de leave the job though sian but pay is still not too bad la..at least job slack but pay still not too reasonable..tml i might wan to go out shopping liao..haven bought a single clothes for very long time liao..and i look forward to my taiwan trip this 10 june..wa i will go there mass buy all those nice clothes and wear it for the next sem..whee..so now must work hard and earn more money..i need to start planning my taiwan journey too liao and do research le..if not i waste my air ticket going there is never do research.
u know this time is the sec time i am tempted to see those kinds online cos i am reali bored online nothing to do..and my friend intro me this webbie so i got curious and decided to take a look at the main page and i dared not go and click into the video cos i scared later see liao will get addicted then die..i dun wan man ! and i scared later see liao will get too shocked..aiyo watever it is i try not to see if i reali too sian le..now i gonna find job liao if not i reali got to eat "grass" liao..
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