~envy~

sat when i was sitting with these grp of 208 ppl, i could felt the glow and shine in this particular ger cos she was sharing her luv story abt mr SK and her and i overheard by accident..haha..yeah i do envy her cos its reali not easy to mantain a relationship with someone who is 8 yrs older than her and yet able to continue their relationship up to now cos i tried tat before..it requires lots of effort and determination..wat makes me envy of her is not tat ring tat mr SK gave her, but rather the long relationship tat she has gone so far despite one is studying and the other is teaching..apparently, i feel tat they should like 2 worlds apart, but apparently FATE brought them together.haha..of cos now i can envy of ppl, but when it reali comes true on me, i would certainly think twice cos i have been through many things in life and know wat i reali wan in life..althogh sometimes many things still appear vaugue on appearance, but i shall heck le, and i shall use my guts and heart to feel wat's rational and logical..though sometimes i always wanted to use my logic to lead me, but i realised tat sometimes it doesnt reali work man..i guess i wouldnt wan to follow mr A style of deciding things cos after i am not as experienced as him..
anyway i asked my friends as in why i am someone who is such an open bk and the reasons tat they gave was becos my expressions gave me away !!! oh shit, i think my facial expressions reali too much.i guess in future i shall try to smile less whenever it comes when ppl trying to dig ans from my side..i shall act and pretend to act normal from now on..and i shall learn now, else i always give myself away man..-notgd-